We all have people in our lives that we would file in our narcissist folder, especially in our workplaces. These are the ones that take credit for our work, regularly insist they are right and tend to throw temper-tantrums. While they may not all be true narcissists, they display enough characteristics that they make our lives a living hell!
What makes navigating the landscape with the ticking time bomb even worse is many of the ways we try to manage this person, actually takes their narcissism to a whole new level. Here are 5 strategies you’ve used in the past that you need to stop…
#1 Stop Trying To Be Friends
If you find a narcissist being friendly to you, do not try to build a friendship. Because true narcissists lack empathy, the friendship will be one-sided and you will give much more than you ever take. You can still be friendly but set clear boundaries.
#2 Don’t Put Them “In Their Place”
While it should be obvious to most, it seems we have all tried at some point to instill some humility in this self-centered ass. A narcissist will never respond well to your criticism or feedback, no matter how well intentioned it may be.
#3 Analyze Your Expectations of Them
When you’re not a narcissist you have the expectation that we should give credit to those that did the work and carefully considered responses when reacting to conflict. Wipe this from your mind when dealing with this person. You do not share the same values.
#4 Come To Terms That You Cannot Fix It
If you’re like me, you’re a fixer. You see narcissist as your next project. When you feel the need to make the world a better place when interacting with them, STOP. You cannot fix this person. I am not saying they are a lost cause. I am saying you cannot do it by yourself.
#5 Don’t Compete with Them
You may have thought that if you can beat them they will have the come to Jesus moment. This will not work. Competing with a narcissist only fuels their behavior. Don’t take the bait. Simply allow them to vent and don’t up the ante yourself.
Eliminating these 5 strategies will not make your frustrations from dealing with this toxic personality disappear but it will make your life easier. The key is to learn as much as possible about what makes this person tick so you find productive and efficient ways to work with them.